Day 8: A Picture

Part of my 30 Days of Kink

Day 8: Post a kinky image you find erotic.

So, I've been a bit worried about this prompt, considering my previous history. Looking across the Internet for a picture that I found erotic could be some serious bad news. However, Daddy came to the rescue, and I realised that there was one picture of Daddy that I found absolutely and completely hot:



I am sure there are sexier pictures of my Daddy, but when I think of my Daddy being sexy, this photo is seriously my mind goes. Woof!

Day 7: Toys

Part of my 30 Days of Kink

Day 7: What’s your favorite toy?

So, I've had a few favourite toys in my time, and the whys and wherefores change pretty frequently. But at the moment, probably my favourite toy would be this one:



I originally bought the blindfold off eXtreme Restraints, mostly because, well, it was blue, and I have pretty much a fetish for the colour blue. Walk me around a store, and anytime there's something that nice and brilliantly blue, you'd better believe I've already homed in on it, and seriously contemplating buying it As you might imagine, my toybox is actually made up almost entirely of blue things! It's just sad that it takes such searching to find good blue toys, although I do tend to have a lot of luck with MJ's Toybox in my home country!

It wasn't until I actually had it in my hands that I realised that the fur on the back of the blindfold was the softest, most luxurious fur you could ever imagine. So, this not only means that wearing it is an absolute dream (although the elastic is a touch tight, that just means that it doesn't come off until I want it to!), it's one of my most treasured sensation toys as well - It's probably the softest non-tickly thing I own, and it tends to come out in some form every time I do a sensation scene. In fact, now that I think about it, I should probably buy a second one - then I can actually blindfold people during sensation play!

Day 6: Fantasies

Part of my 30 Days of Kink

Day 6: Describe your weirdest/most interesting sexual fantasy.

I actually have a lot of weird fantasies, most of which have absolutely no basis in reality. It's something I've been trying to work out of for me - Having crazy fantasies is fine if you don't have a partner, but when none of your sexual fantasies can be acted out by your partner, it doesn't leave anywhere for your sex life to go really. But, this isn't a Fantasy Boy, it's a 30 Days of Kink, so I get to show you one of my impossible fantasies.

One of my weird fantasies is that of dismemberment - where mine or other people's body parts come apart, without death, and with the limbs still alive and usable. The parts that get to come off are Head, Arms, Legs, Cock, Breasts, Lower Body. In these fantasies, there's usually some sort of swapping going on between partners, and if partners "swap" body parts, those body parts come under their control, although if the body parts don't connect to someone else, they're still under control/sensation of their original owner.

There are quite a few sort of "storylines" that this kind of fantasy lends itself to. The one that I found happened quite a bit was me giving my cock to my (usually female) partner to fuck me with, or to suck off. Another one was there being a "collector" of parts, who would often chop and change parts to make whatever he was interested in at the time, which usually ended up in a massive mishmash of body parts, which the collector would then use for their own pleasure. Another was the simple head-swap - Heads are swapped with another person (usually of opposite gender, but not always), and the two of us play with our own bodies (since obviously, you know where all your favourite bits are!).

This is a pretty cold rendition of this fantasy, but honestly, it's for good reason - as I said, I'm trying to get out of these sorts of fantasies, I'm not terribly interested in writing a full porn story about this.

Day 5: First Kink

Part of my 30 Days of Kink

Day 5: What was your first kinky sexual experience? If you haven’t had one yet, talk about what you hope to have happen.

My first real kinky sexual experience happened when I was 18. Really, it was incredibly stupid - I had met a dom online, and ended up meeting him at a gay sex venue in Melbourne for a session. Without really meeting him, without much discussion or fanfare. In fact, for the entire first session, I was blindfolded - didn't even see him.

It was actually a pretty simple introductory scene. From what I remember (and it's been a while, I don't remember everything), he put me into stocks, there was some anal play with a couple of toys (including a fun scene where I was supposed to try and keep a heavy toy up my ass), he used some weights on my balls, there was some play with ice and candles... basically a taster of a whole lot of different types of kink, and then at the end, he put me onto a sling and fucked me (It was definitely a sex scene, because I also remember sucking him off as well). Throughout the scene he took photos and videos of me. I remember that it was a pretty intense scene to my inexperienced self.

I'm not going to say that it was a traumatic experience, because it honestly wasn't. In a lot of ways, it was probably a fairly positive experience all up. But looking back on it, I'm a little horrified by how naive and dangerous I was being due to my inexperience. Anything could have happened that night! Certainly, if I knew what I knew now, I would have done a whole lot more vetting and would have at least met the guy before the event.

But, chalk it up to experience. It definitely showed me that I was quite into kinky play and kinky sex, and thankfully no real harm came to me that night. I did end up meeting the dom later on, and got to actually see his face. But God... What a dolt I was then! Thank god I'm older and wiser now!

Day 4: Early Experiences

Part of my 30 Days of Kink

Day 4: Any early experiences that, in retrospect, hint at your kinks?

Well, yesterday I talked a little about fantasies when I was very young about being a human pet, and I had quite a few of those types of fantasies throughout my childhood. Other than that, there weren't a lot of big signs.

I mean, let's be honest here, I've always been a bit submissive, from cradle to now. I've never been one to take the lead unless there was no choice, and I tended to gravitate towards stronger personalities. This, of course, led me to being bullied by other kids (and getting into very unhealthy friendships with those bullies). And I've always been the kind of kid to poke at bruises, but I don't think that's a masochist trait exactly. I can't honestly say that I've had many real obvious experiences which showed that I'd be a sensation slut, although I do remember that how clothes felt was really important to me (which was a big factor as to why I actually didn't start wearing jeans until I was 14-15 - until that point the sort of jeans I'd get just felt unbearably rough).

I do also remember really like getting into small spaces, which if you stretch it out enough could probably extend into why I like confinement, but honestly that's really stretching it. As I noted before, probably the main reason I like confinement is my sensation sluttiness - I love how it feels to push against my confinement.

So yeah, no particular obvious experiences, but I've always been a subby boy, to tell the truth.

Day 3: Discoveries

Part of my 30 Days of Kink

Day 3: How did you discover you were kinky?

This questions's a bit of an odd one, so I'm going to answer it a few ways. Depending on how you slice it, there's a few ways this can be interpreted, and each one has a different answer.

My first kinky memories are actually at an extremely young age, probably around 6-7. I remember when I was very young having fantasies of running away and becoming the pet of another couple. These fantasies were totally asexual, although even then, I clearly had this view that pets should be naked (after all, dogs don't wear clothes!). I had a few other kinda odd fantasies at the time too, which feature pretty heavily into current kinks, which I'll describe a little later in the month (don't want to lose all my best material!)

I first realised, in a concrete way, that I was kinky around about 18-19. At that point I had a girlfriend, that I enjoyed doing occasional kinky things with. While we switched between each other at first, It eventually defaulted to me being Dominant in most of our play. But around this point, I quite enjoyed our experiences, learned my first love of being tied up, etc.

I first understood, really, that I was more into submission than dominance around about 3-4 years ago, unsurprisingly about the same time I met Daddy. Before then, I'd had inklings of knowledge that I wasn't terribly good at Domming, that I seemed more comfortable in a submissive role, but it didn't really come together my real preferences until I was back in a relationship with real kink.

I didn't come into my current role as boy for another couple of years. Me and Daddy had tried all manner of different roles between us, but no matter what we tried, nothing seemed to feel comfortable. Eventually, we came upon the Daddy/boy dynamic, and decided to give it a try one night, and never really looked back. I was comfortable with the role of being a little bit little, Daddy was comfortable being the caring, nurturing dominant... Really, it was a match just waiting to be found.

Day 2: Your Kinks

Part of my 30 Days of Kink

Day 2: List your kinks.

Good lord, this could take some time. I could just list my BDSM Checklist here, but I think I'll just focus on my big kinks.

First up - I'm a huge sensation slut, for touch in particular. Touch is probably one of my most aware sensations in any play. Alas, my pain tolerance is quite low, so while I love sensation, I have a rocky relationship with pain. I like warm, cold (to an extent), scratchy and soft, all the major feely groups.

The one exception to this is CBT. It's not necessarily that I can deal with more pain in that area (although apparently I can to an extent), but the extremity of sensation that CBT can give to me is a wonderful, beautiful thing. I'm looking forward to engaging in more CBT, truth be told - I feel like I've only scratched the surface of what I'm capable of here.

As a subset of the sensation play, I'm big into Electrical Play. Again, this is something that I have only a little experience in, and would love to explore a little more. This is, unfortunately, one of those parts of BDSM that's quite expensive to get into properly, but I have faith in getting right into it some day! I'm one of those people who really love the sensations that a TENS unit can offer, and I'm even a little into the sort of electrical shocks that, say, electric fences provide. This goes into the whole sensation thing, but it's probably worth shaking out a bit further.

I'm also a big fan of confinement, in it's myriad forms. I especially like being tied up, but I also like being in cages. In fact, I'm writing this post while in a cage! But honestly, there's not much of a limit - put me in leather, put me in rope, wrap me in cling film, no matter how you go about it, as long as my movement's confined, I'm all for it.

One of my biggest turn ons is service. To give my time and my effort to another is a great gift, and being willing to accept it for what it is is incredibly arousing for me. A lot of it is just a natural extension of loving to do chores and such, but there's plenty of other reasons, that I may elaborate on later.

I also love cross-dressing. I like playing as girl for little moments in time. It's one of the reasons I keep my hair long - it means that I can have long, flowing hair, no wig required! :)

I also like animal play. I don't really specify which animal, because when I do do animal play, I'm just a Boy-pet, a weird cat-dog-thing that has it's own rules, and is very insistent on attention!

I also like being exhibitionist - it feeds into the whole wanting attention thing. Of course, the exhibitionism these days isn't something I dwell on too much - I have something akin to a career these days, and I have quite significant trust issues as well, so my exhibitionist tendencies tend to be somewhat mellowed these days.

I'm living and loving orgasm denial. Again, I think it comes back to being confined, but regardless, orgasm denial is a huge, major kink of mine. I even more love the idea of being in physical chastity, being kept in a chastity device. Again, this is something that I'm going to wait until I have more money to pursue further, though.

Getting back into the Kink

I have a schedule these days. Tonight, I was scheduled to do our dishes, to do my service to my Daddy in keeping his kitchen nice and clean.

Tonight, Daddy decided that he would make this task... fun.

First, he instructed me to shower, to make sure that I was properly clean. Once I'd dried myself thoroughly, he pushed me onto the bed, and put a blindfold on me. While I had my hands behind my back, he slid my G-string on to my legs. Then, he slowly put my fishnet stockings on my legs. Next, he had my pair of heels, and one at a time, they were put on as well. Finally, through my blindfold, I could feel one of my dresses. "Hands up" he tells me, and he threads my dress through my arms and head, and then pulls the dress taut, making sure it all fits properly.

Alone, this has got me quite aroused, but Daddy had one more trick. "Turn around. Now Bend over!" as I'm bent over my bed, he takes a little egg vibrator, and places it down the back of my G-string, lodging it firmly on my butt. He turns it on, to a gasp from me.

"Now, go and do your dishes!"

Day 1: Define Yourself

Part of my 30 Days of Kink

Day 1: Dom, sub, switch? What parts of BDSM interest you? Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that means to you. Basically define your kinky self for us.

Right.

Let's get the first one down. I'm a switch, in that I enjoy both being submissive, and being dominant. But I'm definitely not a Top - even when I Dom I much prefer to be the one providing pleasure, rather than the one being given pleasure. Me and Daddy have noted on a couple of occasions that I can be dominant, but I really need to have my subby needs met first. These days I'm getting more dommy urges, but then again I am collared to my Daddy, so I've certainly got my subby needs met right now!

Within that definition, I'm a Boy. I'm not a Slave, or a Submissive, but a Boy. In my case, my service to my Daddy is not about subsuming myself to his desire. I'm a person in my own right, and Daddy would be very displeased if I ever gave that up to him. What I give up, from time to time, in varying amounts, is my adulthood. What my service to my Daddy is is allowing my Daddy to be my main, guiding force for a period. It can, in some cases, be a level of age play, but that's not the thrust of it at all. It's about giving up some of my responsibility to a guardian who will take that responsibility into his own hands, to make me better than I am. It's servitude to a higher goal, Serving to be a better person.

My identity as a Dominant is much less well-defined, however. The only sub I've ever had I didn't have for very long, and so my "style" never really crystallised. I'm sure at some point, when I figure out what I'm looking for, I'll find another sub, maybe at that point I'll start figuring out where I go as a Dominant.

When it comes to the B, D, S & M, I think I'm much more attracted to Bondage and Domination, than the Sadism and Masochism. I love being restricted, both mentally and physically, I like, (paradoxically), the freedom of being caged. I like to think of it like the fear of the blank page. In every step in life, there's myriad possibilities that can go on in the world, and one thing that I appreciate about Kink is that, for a small period of time, I'm cut off from that vortex of possibility, and for once, there's only a few places I can go. Instead of being paralysed by possibility, I can move forward with certainty. There's nothing but the Dominant's instruction, no movement but what the rope master allows, no room but what the cage provides. I can see a single path, and take it without fear or doubt.

And that's my Kinky self and philosophy, laid to bear for you all today.

Some more Chastity thoughts

So, it has now been 303 days since I have last come. Yeah, it's been a while since I've chatted about it, to say the least. A lot of it, frankly, is due to the fact that there hasn't been a great deal to say about it for a while. After the initial few months, there's still the occasional up and down in desire, but with real life interfering in me and Daddy's kink and sex life, it's just not been that much of a priority in my mind. It becomes a very big priority when I am serving Daddy in that way, but in everyday life, to be honest it just doesn't come up terribly often.

So, I don't write about it terribly much. There's only so much of "I can't wait until I get to come again!" that you can write without it being terribly boring, and since me and Daddy gave up on the CB-6000 that we got previously since it was just not suitable for my biology, there's been no developments on that front.

However, I do keep track of one of the FetLife Chastity Communities, and today one of the posters there brought up something that made me think for a bit - Doms in Devices. I mean, when you think about it, it's pretty damn obvious - controlling when your sub gives you pleasure can be just as fun as controlling when your sub gets their own pleasure. And we all know the psychological value of physical cages - having not just behavioural, but physical impediments to your partner's body can be really sexy!

Of course, there's plenty of pleasure that can be had without having access to your cock, but deciding to keep your sexual pleasure out of the picture? It's an interesting thought, anyway.