Inklings: Me and My Cock II

When I first started going out with Daddy, The two of us went to a sex party together. Erin was one of the guests, and I was part of the entertainment. While the night with Erin went swimmingly, My actual performances were... terrible. Despite so many incredibly good looking ladies around me, I couldn't get myself hard at all. I was so anxious around so many people, I just couldn't get into it. After me and Daddy went to bed I kind of broke down in Daddy's arms. I was so angry at my cock that I wanted to rip it off, just get rid of it forever.

Since then, my relationship with my cock has, thankfully, improved significantly. But the relationship is always a little rocky. There's always a part of me that thinks it will look better circumcised. When I masturbate, I tend to put on cock rings or ball stretchers so I feel some pain. And let's not even get into my fetish for CBT. Anything that causes pain around my genitals seems to be A-okay by me.

Part of me always wonders if it's all connected - whether I really do harbour ill-will towards my cock. Whether I'm constantly putting it in the line of danger because I don't really want it. And then there's the question of whether it even matters. Does it matter if I inflict pain on myself so long as I don't do any damage?

For the time-being, I'll just accept that my cock is a target. Frankly, it feels so good I'm not sure I would stop even if I did resolve these issues. And maybe that's an answer in and of itself.

I guess, at least, it will do for now.